I was sound asleep. I hadn’t slept well the night before. There had been a shooting at a local club, Borderline, in which 12 people were killed. The week had been election week and it had been tense, and then DT fired Sessions and more trouble.
At 3:00 a.m. I heard my doorbell frantically ringing and then a huge banging on my door. I threw on my robe and ran to the door. A sheriff stood there. He said, “Mandatory evacuation. You have to go now.”
“I have to get my cats.”
“Leave them.” He said before I closed the door. No way was I going to leave them. Quickly I brushed my teeth and got dressed, put each cat in a carrier and packed them in the car. Nothing else. I had asked him where to go and he said look on the internet. Luckily my complex had told people to go to the evacuation center, so I thought I’d go there.
When I got outside I looked at the hill behind my complex. There was what looked like a 50 ft flame behind it. There were firetrucks at that end and other emergency vehicles. I was about the last car out of the complex. Looked like people had left a long time earlier, which I found out later, they had. Needless to say I was terrified.
I drove through town. It was crazy. Hundreds of cars were trying to get onto the freeway. I drove by a gas station and there was a huge line. Portions of the freeway were closed. I made it to the evacuation center. There were hundreds of cars in the parking lot. I parked in something totally illegal with the stripe lines, but I figured it was an emergency so I didn’t care.
I walked inside the Teen Center which was the evacuation center. People were lying on the floor with blankets and pillows as I entered. As I entered the main room, there were hundreds of people sitting at many tables facing a huge TV screen which told about the fires. There were many dogs with their owners. I saw a couple cats in carriers too. I had left mine in the car. After using the bathroom, I returned to my car. Scared to death, not knowing if I would have a home to go to, and since I only had my cats and myself, I would have nothing if it took my apartment. I sat and cried for a couple hours. I wanted to know what was going on. If my apartment was still there. I drove out and up Erbes Road. There was fire on both sides and it was blocked off. It didn’t look good, especially with the smoke coming from the direction of my apartment complex. I returned to the evacuation center. I stayed with my animals in the car for a while then went inside where I ran into a woman in the bathroom who was as freaked out as I was. She had a house in Agoura Hills. She, her husband and their cockatiel made it out. I think everyone felt like I did. I just wanted to cry.
After a couple hours when it was light, I tried to go home again. This time there was traffic and the fires had died down on Erbes. Still so much had burned. I got home and the police weren’t blocking our road so I decided to go home. Still unsure if it was safe, I walked around the back of the building which faced a large hill. The fire had been there, about 10 feet from my building. There were still hotspots and one large one. My neighbors and I watched to make sure we would be safe. Throughout the day I would walk around and monitor the spot fires. Other neighbors helped with pouring buckets of water on spots and taking shovels to dig up the embers. Fear just wouldn’t go away.
TV, internet and phone all went down. Silence wasn’t something I wanted. I put on a DVD just for the noise. Very scary. Another night of not knowing if we would be safe. Tough sleeping wondering if you would have to get up to flee again. My sister sent me a gift of dried fruit and nuts. I had to take it to the firemen. They had saved my apartment. With no job and money, that was the best I could do. Every moment I have been a mess of nerves, living in the “I don’t know what is going to happen” mode. I would walk around to see if there were fires nearby. Luckily none yesterday (Sunday) but even though the mandatory evacuation was lifted here, this morning Simi Valley has a large fire and the winds are wicked, so I’m on 1st alert. I have to have the TV on to give me updates of all the fires. I worry for so many people I have not talked to to see if they are okay. Difficult times.
Another night with little sleep, more fires today. Stressed. Watching the news constantly and also my emails. Received one from our local neighborhood group that a fire was down the street across from the park. I walked out and they must have got it by the time I got there as I saw nothing. Then another started above Lake Sherwood. I knew this area well. I had done some work up there. Looks like it is going towards the ocean, but still stressed as you never know.
It’s been a week, but I remain with the chinks in my armor. I have always been the fearless one, but suddenly I’m not. Perhaps it is the fact that the world around me is burnt and black, the air smells like smoke, my friend lost his house, and many people are still not home. Guilt? Maybe. Funny, I spoke to someone today and they poo pooed the evacuation as if it wasn’t a big deal. Lucky them. Perhaps it was the way I was woken and the sight of the flame behind my building. I don’t know, but it was a big deal to me.